A Call To The Universe

So, I’ve been preoccupied lately with the knotty puzzle of just how, where and when to come out to my family. And though, as i said in my last post, I think I now have the opening I need to start that conversation, I still haven’t hit on just how to go about it. Chewing on this has eaten up a lot of brain power and peace of mind. Enough so that it has affected my precious few minutes of daily Skype time with Special Femme.

But Special Femme is special for many reasons, one of which is her incisive mind. She suggested that, having witnessed together the amazing and wonderful results of others’ actions to “put into the Universe” what they desired, that it couldn’t hurt to give it a go on this, too.

So, here’s me asking the Universe to make my coming out to my family phenomenally great. I think the odds of it going this way are pretty slim and I’m not expecting perfection. Also, my inexperience may be working against me in knowing just what to ask for. But if the Universe can provide, then this is what I want my coming out to my family to be like (in no particular order):

I want the experience to include simple, unadorned words of unconditional love and acceptance from all of them.

The initial and continuing experience will be free of shaming, humiliation, derision and judgement.

I want them to ask tactful questions from a place of care and a desire to understand, without judgement or rancor.

I don’t want them to pry into the ultra personal, asking grossly explicit questions that they’d never think to ask of a straight person.

They’ll acknowledge me and my identity without cringing, flinching or denial.

Reassurance of their steadfast love and unshakable support will be their first reaction, before any fear or doubt for my spiritual well-being.

They will recognize that my love for them is the same today as it was yesterday, strong and steady and without reserve.

They’ll understand and support the coming changes in my life and living arrangements as a necessary evolution of my emerging independence.

They won’t treat me as the broken spinster whom they need to fix.

They’ll acknowledge the courage it takes to own with pride an identity they’ve ignored, mislabeled or dismissed in the past.

They’ll be kind, welcoming, generous and open with Special Femme, treating her with respect as a person and as my girlfriend.

They will not cite past events of my life as the regrettable cause of my “choosing” this hard and difficult “lifestyle”.

They will not shout at, make demands of, berate or humiliate me or Special Femme.

They will not disown or shun me or Special Femme.

They will look for ways to build community with me and Special Femme and respond to our efforts to do so with each of them.

They will recognize the unconscious homophobic comments that sometimes lace their discourse and will correct it.

They will seek to understand my gender identity and expression in context of my sexuality.

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2 comments so far

  1. SopranoOut on

    I’ll join you in calling out to the universe for things to go as you wish. And I’ll tell you what a mentor told me when I was terrified to come out to my family. She said “it will liberate you all.” That has held true for me, and so I pass along that prophecy and that intention to you as well.


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