Joyful Intention

Holy moly! It’s been a real long time since I wrote anything here. As you can likely relate, this year has been a rollercoaster of a time! Like many of you, I have limited my social media exposure over the bulk of this year out of self-preservation and a need to mute the cacophony of angst and anger and hate and pain that has filled this dumpster fire of a year. That self-care strategy extended to also not writing here; it was a variation on the maxim “if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all”, combined with “no one wants to hear you complain”. I figured that while we’re all in the same storm, feeling the same winds and rough seas, not everyone is in the same vessel and those of us in more privilieged circumstances should maybe not take up all the oxygen in the room. So I’ve stayed quiet here, even as I’ve continued my (mostly) daily hand-written journaling practice in order to siphon some of the angst, as well as to record some bit of good in each day.

But as this year draws to an end, I have felt called to mark it in some way. I wrote words of thanks and (hopefully) encouragement and inspiration to my work team. Many have already responded with their gratitude and returned best wishes. That’s hopeful and feels good. But I feel called still. So I thought I’d write a quick bit here…as much for myself as for any of you who still follow this blog.

I saw in my Facebook feed one friend who’s tradition is to set intentions, not resolutions, for the coming year, and to select a word that will serve as the theme or as a guiding prompt for his heart and deeds in the months ahead. I like this and am brazenly steeling the idea for myself. Intentions versus resolutions seems to me kinder, less authoritarian and strict, yet still rigorous enough to provide structure. And a guiding prompt is a familiar concept – I have been clinging to the hopefulness of the positivity movement for many years and have used it as a prompt for my thoughts and actions and even for my writing. The “One Good Thing” practice I have chronicled in this blog so often is an embodiment of that guiding prompt device. Combined, the intention and prompt could be a powerful tool to mold and motivate, without the heavy judgement that always seems packed into a resolution and any failure to fulfill that resolve.

So here’s my take on the concept: I will set intentions into which I will prompt myself to grow and mature, but I will not impose them as binders or weights on my spirit or on anyone in my life and I will be kind to myself when assessing whether I achieve any of those intentions in any increment of the coming year.

In other words, shame-free, guilt-free opportunity for growth and self-improvement. That’s the goal of this exercise.

My Intentions for 2021:

• More hope, less fear
• More acceptance of love and affection, less denial, demurrer and negativity
• More self-love and acceptance, less hurtful self-talk

I have intentionally limited myself to three. There are innumerable intentions within me and I will certainly work on many of them. But these three will be my priority for deliberate growth. With these tools, I hope to become a more loving, care-free, soulful person. I want to emerge from this program with a habit of loving myself and others without fear and without judgment. I want to become what I hope to receive from others.

My Word for 2021 (Guiding Prompt): JOYFUL

That word is tricky. It can mean so many things, depending on a person’s circumstances in any given moment. For me for 2021, I want to be guided by the thought that there is joy to be found, joy to be made, joy to be experienced in all seasons, in nearly all circumstances. What I don’t mean is the purely giddy, emotional happiness of a nice gift or fun event.

What I do mean is that there is deeply-rooted joy in living, even when living is hard. There is joy in learning the lessons of the rough days, so that future me can have more ease and comfort in future rough days because I learned and applied those lessons. There is joy in the stillness. There is joy in the aloneness. There is joy in the uncomfortably loud and crowded.

There is joy.

I want to find all the ways joy manifests. I want to uncover the hidden joy. I want to create joy for myself and the ones I love by using the joy of the past, the wisdom joy imparts, the wealth of joy in sparse times, to inform and enrich the moment we’re in at any given point.

I want to be guided by centering joy so that what I do each day propagates that blessing in myself and those around me. I want to use joy as a tool to be more hopeful, more loving and accepting of love, and more loving and accepting of myself.

These are lofty, intimidating goals. But they are achievable in many dimensions and by many measures. They do not have to be mountains that are arduous to climb. They can be baby steps in small moments in each day.

One that I am already actively working on is overcoming the impulse to demur a compliment of my person when I know that it is genuinely meant and freely given. By accepting the gift of a kind word and thought from someone who cares for me, I let the joy of that moment shine and guide my thoughts and spirit and actions to return that love and affection just as freely. It’s not a world-changing feat. But is a small measure of good put back into a world in desperate need of goodness and kindness. And it doesn’t require great effort, only a will to accept good and reject negativity. It’s something I can do, repeatedly, and come out on the other side a better person. That small step to putting intention into practice is a win.

That’s what I hope to achieve with this effort this year: put these intentions into practice and become a better, more loving, more positive, joyful person because of it.

Happy New Year, my friends. May 2021 bring light, love, grace, and healing to all of us.